Jed Bickford - Training & Mentorship for Entrepreneurial Couples

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BUSINESS TALK IN THE BEDROOM IS KILLING YOUR INTIMACY

Two months ago, my partner Madison and I were on the verge of signing a big contract.

With a flourish of blue ink, we'd be reshaping our next years by purchasing a resale clothing store — a deal we'd worked on for months.

We both had day jobs, and spent our evenings making marketing plans, reviewing contracts, and rallying co-investors.

Naturally some of the work would spill over into our conversations at dinner, our walks, and our 'getting ready for bed' time. We'd excitedly talk about ideas, share concerns, and make plans. We felt like a solid team.

Yet I had a sense that this might not be the right way.

You see, I've done this before. And the last business I started with my romantic partner led to divorce.

So a small voice in me kept whispering "take a break" ... "don't focus entirely on the business" ... "save some time just for the two of you."

I ignored it.

One day, at the peak of our stress, we had just taken showers and found ourselves standing in our bedroom at 9:30pm, both naked, having a heated debate about the color of our logo. Our voices raised, our tempers flaring, we were getting into that danger zone where a discussion turns personal.

I paused and took a breath, then started laughing. She said, "This isn't funny!"

I replied, "Sure, the topic is important ... but what's funny is that we're having a naked meeting!"

In that moment we realized that we'd let our business become so important it'd engulfed our life together.

We were having naked meetings.

That day we made a promise to each other, our own personal pact:

No naked meetings.

When we step into our bedroom, we're crossing a line into our personal world.

One where we don't lie in bed putting out fires in the business, discussing that problematic employee, and in general, blurting out the anxieties that plague us.

There’s time for all that...but it's sure as hell not going to claim the precious moments we have reserved for each other.

Does this sound familiar? Do you lie in bed making plans… instead of making love?

Stop. It doesn’t need to be that way.

(BTW, if your romantic partner isn’t your business partner, do you still treat them like one? There's likely some flavor of conversations you need to stop.)

The first step to preventing your business from claiming your relationship is to ban meetings from your bedroom. Repeat after me: “No naked meetings.”

Try it for a week.

Don’t worry, I’m sure you'll find some other fun things to do in there. ;-)

PS: My next article will cover a handy little tool to make this easier.